It’s manipulative and unfair, and frankly, widowed who do this are the worst kinds of assholes. If the idea of dating makes you nauseous, or seems like something best put up on a shelf for the time being, there’s nothing wrong with that.The point is that the days of donning mourning for public displays of grieving for specific periods of time are long over.That’s never more important than when you’re beginning to date again after losing your spouse.When you’re a widow or widower, dating someone can be the beginning of a new chapter of your life; a chance to move on and make new memories, while cherishing those you made in the past.3) Be honest about what you want out of dating with yourself and the people you date. If you are in the market for more – act like you are.4) Which brings me to this: if you are in the habit of using your widowhood to manipulate situations and people, you aren’t ready to date. You know what I am talking about – playing the “widow card”.Once a widow hits 65, the odds for remarriage fall off sharply.
Embrace the older, wiser you and date with the confidence that you are surrounded by people just like you; all Love Begins At’s members will either understand your circumstances or have had a similar experience of their own.
Anyone who is spouting rules and timelines at you has an ulterior agenda, and you are within your rights to question them and it. Even if you aren’t sure, meeting a guy or gal for coffee never hurt anybody, and enjoying the occasional Starbuck’s isn’t a commitment to anything.
Love Begins is a dating site for over-40s that’s committed to making all our users feel welcome, happy and above all comfortable in their dating experiences.
But there are those who wait out the so-called year deadline of propriety too, and others who buy wholeheartedly into the notion that they must “work at their grieving” to get it all out of their system before trying to move on in any aspect of their lives, dating included. In my opinion, and experience, when thinking about it begins to more of a logistical “how will I do it” rather than a daydream to chase away sadness, you are probably ready to look into it at the very least.
A couple of cautions: 1) Your family and friends will be at different stages of “ready for you to date” than you are.